leftover thoughts tumbling…

got hooked on another series, thanks to uilleam. 


firefly
.

such a quiet name for so much action.
at least this one has a movie to finish the story.
serenity.  and you feel anything but when you’re watching it.
maybe at the end….

it’s raining out.
the midwest get’s freezing fog and we get rain.
it was so warm and muggy today we had to turn the air on.
maybe i should find a rancher in montana who’ll marry me.
but tonight the rain holds the promise of colder weather.

we still have our christmas lights up. 
shelly and i just haven’t had the time or energy to take them away.
i can see them out the windows while i type, and the dark rain beyond.
i don’t know why i’m still turning them on, halfway through january.
they’re there.  it would be sad to waste the chance to see them.

i can’t explain what christmas lights do to me.
i feel…something. 
or the idea of something. 
i don’t know.
even white lights strung up for something else, like a wedding.
the tiny twinkle of those lights in the night opens something up in me as only a few things in this world can.

why is that?

and why am i up at two in the morning typing out my thoughts for all the world to see?
don’t you know that’s dangerous?

Life as a dilema…

I guess I keep thinking it’s spring with all this lovely weather we’ve been having.
This is how spring should be.  Ours hits a little fast and get’s warm before you can get out of your sweaters.
Yes, January usually brings gorgeous blue skies for a few glorious weeks.
February…well, “I got the blues” works pretty well most years.

I can’t decide if I’m glad that I’m sick or not.
Yeah, sure, it’s miserable physically, but it makes me slow down and notice the sunshine.
If I was healthy I’d be working up a storm inside and forget to dash out for a minute.
Or, maybe, if I was healthy I would enjoy it more because I’d feel better.
I could get the “Bourne Supremacy” soundtrack on my sister’s MP3 player and go for a run.
I could take my baby sister outside and play and swing and jump on the trampoline.
(As it is, I’m banned from going near her in case I can’t help breathing on her.  The last thing we need is her sick.)

So I’ve been taking slow walks up the street with a different brother every day,
and lazing around on my bed watching the sun change everything into different colors
as I try to read or write so I’ll stay calm and not work myself into a coughing frenzy (dry coughs are the pits).
What I wouldn’t give for enough well-ness to clean the bathroom right now.
It would do both of us a lot of good (me and the bathroom, that is).

I’m rambling.  But my brain is turning to mush in spite of all it’s activity lately.  It needs my body to move, too.
Or maybe I’m just hungry.  I think I forgot to eat today…

I guess I’ll be content wherever I am.  I’ll be glad that God sent
such lovely weather for me to enjoy while I recover, and I’ll pray that
my efforts to keep from getting worse will pay off, and maybe, just
maybe, the skies’ll still be blue when I’m ready to go for that run.

This year I want to…

I’ve finally figured out that I won’t
be perfect by the end of next year, no matter how hard I try, no matter
how long I actually remember any New Year’s resolutions.  But I
love lists.  So I made one.  Just a few things I’d like to accomplish
someday….and this year seemed like a good time to start.

shrink.  as in, get smaller.  at least get fit and fit my
clothes better [details not being shared with the general public]
be able to run at least the whole long-block [2 miles?] without stopping to walk
practice not spending money
have a prayer list for a few specific people and causes and really keep it up
memorize a book of the New Testament instead of just verses or chapters [I’m thinking Ephesians]
finish a nonfiction book, from the many I’ve started
read a classic, even if it kills me [because “wading” through some of those doesn’t cut it]
read every unread book on my shelves



Oh, and one more that I’ve always known but somehow forget sometimes…..

                “…love the Lord your God with all your heart,
           
           
           
           
           
          with all your soul,
           
           
           
           
           
           
    and with all your mind.”

Jesus called it the greatest commandment. 
I’m not sure I really ever thought to make it my goal in life.

Every life offers proof of it’s best love…

I know what I want my life to prove.

“feels like a brand new day…”

It’s a recovery day.  There is such a thing as too much fun.
Especially when you have a three hour drive back home at eleven.
But it was so worth it.

Visited with grandmas.
Watched the Cowboys (wretched) game with aunts and uncles, something I really missed doing.
Drove out to cousins’ in “hick-ville”, as they call it, for New Year’s Eve festivities.
My aunt and uncle are such wonderful hosts…we always feel relaxed there.
Lots of food and good conversation.
Shot off our firecrackers a little early so the younger ones would be able to see them.
Some really big ones always make it fun.
Or the noisy kind that have about twenty-five that come whistling and shrieking out of a box.
Those are the most fun when you light about three of them sitting next to each other,
and one of them falls over and aims at half your group.
Screaming laughter and mass scrambling are always a hit.
The dry ice bomb was also a hit. 
And the two sheriff’s cars that drove by just after we’d cleaned up our mess added to the general thrill.
We girls played “Apples to Apples”, with occasional input or advice from the boys.
And a few of our players tried to also keep up an IM conversation with the cousin stationed in Japan.
Later went out to watch the neighbors set off their fireworks at
midnight, and a couple of the girls got on the roof for a better view.
Then our dads wanted to watch “Independence Day.”  An oddly fitting end to our year.

Some of us older cousins drove out to see our grandpa at the veteran’s home in Temple.
Played “Apples to Apples” again in the car.  Even Dad played while he drove.
Took Grandpa to Wendy’s and enjoyed his comments about people and places.
When Steph said she always wondered what the little girl with the red braids had really looked like
(wasn’t she Dave Thomas’ granddaughter or something?), Grandpas said, “I think that’s a little devil.”
Well…her braids do kind of stick up.

It was hard to leave him, especially for Daddy.  Someday soon one of our families will have a house
with enough room for him.  That’s what we’re all working towards.

More good food and fun back out at cousins’.  The children had built a bonfire out on the back of the property,
and one of our cousins took some old, yucky bottles of non-dairy creamer to show them “magic with fire.” 
It makes a pretty good whoosh-ing flame that follows the powder up into the can.
It’s especially thrilling if he does it off of a stick that you’ve got a flame on.

Monster’s Inc. for the parents and the children.
Computer games and conversation for us older kids.
We taught Kat how to make reading out loud more fun by simply randomly flipping through a nice long book and
reading the first line of every page.  Or if you’re really skilled, you can simply read whatever jumps off the page.
Laughing seems to be our favorite thing to do with our cousins.

in case i’ve fallen off the face of the planet…

Unlocked my site for Mrs. H.  *smiles*



Christmas was wonderful…more later, and maybe some pictures, too.



Busy, busy weekend.



Saw some old friends and a really fun musical last night,  had a great time.



Wedding today.  Baked a cake for it yesterday and iced it this morning right before I took the dog to the kennel.



Packing while we get ready for the wedding…now that’s crazy.



Then visit to grandparents (where the rest of the family is).



I miss my Gracie.





Happy New Year!

Behold,   

        the Lamb of God

   
           
           
           
           
   

                          which taketh away the sins of the world.

Christmas Eve is….

~waking up to cold rain…almost as good as snow for the feeling of being snug
~singing Christmas carols all the way to church
~a wonderful morning service
~miracles
~a friend healed
~eggnog right after church to hold me off till dinner
~listening to Nat King Cole while I stir gravy for half-an-hour
~friends over for a Christmas feast
~a few more gifts to wrap
~relaxing on the couch looking at the outrageous amount of presents under the tree
~marveling that said presents will disappear so quickly tomorrow morning
~looking forward to watching a great football game with Dad and the boys tomorrow
~pie
~cool whip
~opening “name gifts” with siblings
~and one present for Dad who is still a kid at heart
~(Mom won’t open any yet)
~”It’s a Wonderful Life” with Daddy before bed



                 
is there anything more amazing


        than the sound of rumbling thunder?






it means awe, anticipation.  comfort when you’re indoors, excitement when you’re out.






thunder makes me think of my God.

canoeing Christmases…

last year it took me three days to get the smell of woodsmoke out of my hair.
maybe because it was wet when i spent a few hours huddled near the fire.
this year i don’t plan to repeat the experience.
it was an amazing adventure,
and it made a great story–
(see entry from Dec. 15, 2005)
but i think i’ll stay dry this year
and keep the mud out of my mouth
and pretend to be a grown-up.



and could somebody please say this weather needs to END!

best compliment ever

My life (working with children so much) does not afford me many
opportunities to dress up, so I’ve become rather casual, even though I
dearly love pretty clothes.  Well, last night we had our yearly
Christmas girl party, so I seized the moment and arrived dressed to the
nines (well, at least to the eights, which is as far as my current
wardrobe allowed).  When I walked in one of the younger(ish) girls
said, “Sara, you look smashing!  If there was a boy here, he
would be smashed.”